Wanna know the main thing that makes boring people “boring”?They stay on an even keel at all mother freaking times. But what does that mean?
What it means is that they’re afraid to modulate their voices. They’re afraid to go loud, they’re afraid to go low, they’re afraid to be fast, they’re afraid to be quiet, they’re afraid to effectively do anything interesting, dynamic, or exciting with their voices.
So, what they do instead is stay on an even keel. They speak like machines. Literally imagine a robot speaking and that’re how boring people talk. They act like the content of their words is everything and the way these words are delivered is nothing.
They act like if they were to take the chance to throw any kind of energy, passion, enthusiasm, life, or zest into those words they’d be laughed at and ostracised from society.
They act like there’s huge risk involved in being interesting.
If you’ve been following me for a while you’ve heard me say that only 7% of the feeling somebody gets from you comes from the words you say. And that’s very true. The oven 93% comes from your vocal tone, your body language, your eye contact and all of this good stuff. So, the way to be more interesting is to throw your energy into the other 93% of your communication.
Speak loud, speak quiet, pull people in close, really get into your body as you speak, and basically have fun with the communication that you’re engaged in.
THAT’S HOW NOT TO BE BORING.
Now I’m going to give you an exercise that will help you not run out of things to say in conversations.
THE WORD ASSOCIATION GAME.
So it goes like this. You’re gonna sit for 10 minutes on your own (daily) and talk to yourself without stopping. Seriously, for the entire time you cannot ever once stop talking, that’s the only rule.
Now your goal is obviously to constantly come up with things to say and here’s how you’re going to do it.
Step 1. Say A Sentence
For instance – My head is bald like Kojak
Step 2. Use The Last Word of That Sentence To Trigger Another Sentence
For instance – Most people reading this probably have never heard of Kojak
Step 3. Repeat Step 2 Until The Time Is Up
For instance – Kojak also used to be a famous brand of cameras, but I haven’t heard of them for years, I wonder what happened to them
It’s weird how things can be a part of your life and then without you realising they just disappear
Fuck, being apple to disappear at will would be such a fucking cool super power. Think of how much crime I could commit and get away with
Apparently they said that most people don’t follow laws out of morality but because they’re scared of being caught.
AND SO ON AND SO ON.
So as I hope you can see, this exercise will help train your brain to come up with conversational topics by having you focus on the conversation itself and not your own insecurities.
By forcing yourself to keep your mouth moving until the timer runs out you don’t have time to worry about whether or not what you have to say is good enough. You just have to go for it.
We’ll use this call to discuss your current situation with dating and see if you’re a good fit for one-on-one coaching.